Friday started off pretty calm. I met up with John, the prince of all things maintenance, to perform the final checks on the four new pools we were opening to the public that evening. John was old school when it came to pool maintenance; he did everything by hand. These new pools came equipped with a fully automated chlorination system that he was having a bit of a hard time wrapping his head around. We went from pool to pool that day testing the ph levels on each. When we arrived at the new hot tub, we were greeted by old Henry and a crowd of his friends who were all ready and waiting to christen the new hot tub. I always thought that Henry had been misnamed at birth and had his parents waited a while, they would have named him Harry because he was one of the hairiest men I had ever seen. Old Henry stepped right up to us and proclaimed that he volunteered to be the first man in the new hot tub. Before we could stop him, he threw off his towel and stepped right in. He submerged himself all the way up to his neck and shouted “I’m number one!” He sat there for a moment with a big smile on his face, and then I asked him, “How’s the water, Henry?” He said, “The water is fine!” and proceeded to exit the tub. Everyone applauded as he stepped out, but then suddenly, the crowd silenced. What we didn’t realize is that since we had not tested that tub yet, we were unaware that it had extremely high acid levels. As he made his way out of the hot tub, it became very apparent that hairy Henry wasn’t so hairy anymore. In fact, every hair on Henry’s body below his neck had been melted off. After a quick hose down, we determined that besides the radical hair loss, old Henry wasn’t that much worse for wear.
Saturday night was to be the piece de resistance: the ribbon cutting ceremony to officially open Club Fred. The club was packed that night with patrons in scantily clad costumes to celebrate All Hallows Eve for the first time in the new club. I had painstakingly prepared for this ceremony by painting a large pair of old hedge trimming shears with gold paint and stretching a beautiful golden ribbon across the dance floor. I had asked DJ Jesse, “The Legend”, to call up Fred and Randi to officiate and I handed over the microphone and the golden shears to Fred. He then approached the golden ribbon, made a short speech, and attempted to cut the ribbon. Unfortunately, the ribbon remained intact. After an unsuccessful second attempt, he proclaimed, “I’m sure my staff tested this prior to asking me up here.”, which of course I hadn’t. At that point, “The Legend” sprang into action, grabbed a pair of scissors from the DJ booth and by the time he was completing his third attempt, swooped down and cut the ribbon. I’m pleased to say that the rest of the weekend went off without a hitch.
I still look back on the events of that Halloween with a great deal of fondness. If I had to do it all over again, I think I might have sharpened those damn hedge trimmers, but other than that, I wouldn’t change a thing.
Until next time, keep your trimmers sharp and watch your acid levels, dudes.
Saturday night was to be the piece de resistance: the ribbon cutting ceremony to officially open Club Fred. The club was packed that night with patrons in scantily clad costumes to celebrate All Hallows Eve for the first time in the new club. I had painstakingly prepared for this ceremony by painting a large pair of old hedge trimming shears with gold paint and stretching a beautiful golden ribbon across the dance floor. I had asked DJ Jesse, “The Legend”, to call up Fred and Randi to officiate and I handed over the microphone and the golden shears to Fred. He then approached the golden ribbon, made a short speech, and attempted to cut the ribbon. Unfortunately, the ribbon remained intact. After an unsuccessful second attempt, he proclaimed, “I’m sure my staff tested this prior to asking me up here.”, which of course I hadn’t. At that point, “The Legend” sprang into action, grabbed a pair of scissors from the DJ booth and by the time he was completing his third attempt, swooped down and cut the ribbon. I’m pleased to say that the rest of the weekend went off without a hitch.
I still look back on the events of that Halloween with a great deal of fondness. If I had to do it all over again, I think I might have sharpened those damn hedge trimmers, but other than that, I wouldn’t change a thing.
Until next time, keep your trimmers sharp and watch your acid levels, dudes.
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